Who Faces More Shame? Drinkers Or Non-Drinkers?

Sometimes I hear that the alcohol-free space might be shaming those who drink. It’s a fair point as not everyone is sober curious. And not everyone needs to be.

But 81% of adults in England drank last year, proving drinking is the norm ~ socially, culturally & emotionally.

So if 4 out of 5 people drink, isn’t it more likely that someone who doesn’t drink will stand out, face questions, or be shamed for not drinking.

If you don’t drink, you are in a minority. And in a country where being a bit tipsy is woven into humour, holidays, and any day that ends in Y, is it any wonder that being able to resist that, and not drink, feels like an accomplishment?

Not drinking stands out because the majority of people drink.

That makes seeing someone who doesn’t drink, more noticeable, more memorable, and more likely to be questioned, or seen as on some morale high ground.

Because that’s the script we were given to socialise, generations ago.

At Arclett, I hear from people who want to take break, but don’t ~ not because they can’t, but because they’re worried how others will react.

That’s the barrier we’re working to dismantle. Old school social pressure.

Many people who don’t drink, for reasons like pregnancy / religious beliefs, get a pass. While those in recovery face stigma, they're less likely to be pressured and more likely to praised for their choice. The challenge is for those who aren’t drinking for any of these socially acceptable reasons.

We don’t shame people who drink. People who drink are exactly who we want to reach, so we do our best to not alienate them.

We talk about choice, options, and curiosity.

Sober curiosity has to start somewhere, and whether for a month, a year, or forever ~ people should feel encouraged and inspired, not fearful.

From personal experience, I spent my last 12 months of drinking just to people please. If alcohol wasn’t the default, I’d have stopped way earlier.

With Arclett, we’re intentionally not “alcohol causes cancer”. We’re simply ~ would life feel less complicated if you didn’t drink ~ or drank less. And we’re here if you want in.

Not drinking can be a positive, lifestyle choice, just like anything else we do to take care of ourselves.

We see campaigns like Dry January like training for a marathon. It might be hard. But it’s a wellness choice. A discipline. A reset.

The difference is, training for a marathon is usually encouraged ~ but choosing not to drink is still questioned or judged.

The only way we change this is by talking about it ~ yet when we do, we’re seen as preachy. That’s the difficulty.

We’re not trying to work toward a world where no one drinks. We’re trying to create a space where people don’t drink just to fit in or avoid awkward conversations.

Because the strangest thing is not that people choose not to drink ~ but that some only drink out of fear of what others might say if they didn’t.